Yes, you’re welcome.
So onto the first bit of news: the
Remember World War II? Of course not – if you were born then you probably wouldn’t be reading a blog. Suffice to say it was a global armed conflict that occurred between 1939 and 1952 (more on that in a future post). By the time the war began,
Anybody who’s ever conducted “weird” experiments knows damn well how they usually turn out. A race of giant, lethally delicious eels was soon developed, and the scientists working on the project became paranoid about allowing them to leak into the greater world and thus leave fewer for themselves. The outbreak of war, unfortunately, allowed looser security measures, and several eels escaped into a network of lakes in the central part of what would later become
With the fall of Communism, knowledge of these eels spread throughout the ruling classes of the reigning world powers (
Sources inform us that the reason for today’s rapprochement is that the current President simply doesn’t have a taste for these slimy creatures. “Yuppie food,” he’s been known to call them to his close circle of advisors. The diplomatic cartwheels the U.S. has been forced to endure on behalf of this situation have strained Washington’s resources, and so Bush has, in what will no doubt stand as his last significant policy decision, allowed the potential for the whole world to be informed of these really quite scrumptious North Korean eels.
The future of
What will happen if open channels of trade allow the secret to be revealed? There are a number of scenarios, each one doomsday-ier than the last. Our guess is that, if